In organisations where difficult conversations are avoided, issues rarely disappear. They simply go underground. Over time, this avoidance can erode trust, damage working relationships and quietly undermine performance. In contrast, organisations that approach these moments with care often find that relationships strengthen rather than fracture.

Many people avoid difficult conversations because they worry about upsetting others. These concerns are understandable, particularly when teams are busy and resolving issues feels insurmountable. However, I’ve seen how unresolved conflict has a significant negative impact on engagement and productivity, not to mention well being. Poorly managed conflict can lead to stress, absenteeism and reduced trust between colleagues. In practice, what often causes the most harm is not the conversation itself, but the silence around it.

Effective conversations start with clarity. Understanding what the issues are without diving in with your own views is vital, finding the facts with evidence that supports the outcomes, but isn’t biased is also important. Preparation allows discussions to be calmer and more purposeful. And using empathy for all parties, even where there are clear wrong doings. 

Conversations about relationships at work can feel particularly uncomfortable. Whether it’s navigating romantic relationships, addressing perceived favouritism, managing fallouts between colleagues, or resetting boundaries when relationships change, these discussions often carry extra emotional weight and can feel particularly difficult to raise. Emotions are often higher, assumptions creep in more quickly, and people worry about saying the wrong thing. This makes clarity, empathy and active listening even more important, not less. Avoiding these conversations can allow assumptions to grow and tensions to spill into wider team dynamics, making early, thoughtful dialogue even more important.

• Try to move your focus away from intent and towards observable behaviour and impact to reduce defensiveness and keep the conversation grounded. 
• Active listening requires slowing conversations down, reflecting back what has been heard, and checking understanding before responding. Feeling heard lowers defensiveness and creates space for problem-solving.
• In healthier organisational cultures, difficult conversations are part of ongoing honest dialogue rather than crisis moments. Regular check-ins and open feedback reduce anxiety and strengthen trust. 
• HR and People teams play a key role by supporting leaders with frameworks and coaching.

A conversation is only the beginning. Clear actions, agreed next steps and thoughtful check-ins show that conversations matter and that change is expected.

Handled well, difficult conversations become opportunities to strengthen relationships, rebuild trust and create healthier ways of working together.  But this doesn’t happen by accident. These are skills -  and like any skill, they need practice, reflection and the confidence to slow things down when emotions or assumptions start to run ahead of us.

From our perspective, the organisations that do this best aren’t those where everyone agrees all the time. They’re the ones where people feel able to say, “Something doesn’t feel right here”  and trust that the conversation will be met with curiosity rather than defensiveness. That’s where active listening really earns its keep - not just hearing words, but making sure everyone is actually travelling in the same direction, even when the route feels uncomfortable.

This is exactly why we run training like “Active Listening Skills: Shall We Just Agree to All Travel in the Same Direction?” and “Tackling Tricky Conversations with Ease and Empathy”. They’re designed to help leaders and managers move away from avoidance, panic, or over-policing tone and instead build practical confidence in navigating the conversations that matter most. Not perfectly, just humanly.

If you want to chat or find out more about our training offering, reach out to us at info@freshseed.co.uk.